Weather the Storm
by ImSoCooliPissIceCubes
Summary: Can Callie and Arizona find their way back to each other after Arizona's infidelity?
1. Chapter 1

_Apparently, I lost you. _

The four words stabbing Arizona Robbins in the chest as she watches her completely heartbroken and devastated wife leave the Attendings Lounge where she just screamed and yelled at her, basically blaming her affair on her. There were tears in both of their eyes, hurt and anger ever present, but at the end, when Callie uttered those four words, she just looked broken beyond repair. Like the life was sucked right out of her at the end.

Arizona's POV

Watching Calliope leave the lounge felt like my heart was being ripped out. _Apparently, I lost you._ Those words keep replaying over in my head. I've yelled and I've screamed... I blamed her for pretty much everything that's gone wrong this past year, and she's taken it, but when I yelled and screamed this time, after cheating on her with a woman I never want to see again, the look on her face, the look in her eyes was complete defeat.

She wasn't on that fucking mountain. She wasn't there to witness Cristina picking the bugs out of my leg. She wasn't there to see Mark almost giving up to be with Lexie while laying his head on my lap. She wasn't there to hear the animals ripping Lexie apart. She wasn't there.

Why am I still so angry with her? Why do I have this resentment towards her? My leg. That's why I do. She promised me she wouldn't let me take my leg. Yet, here I am, with a pain in the ass prosthetic. I tried to get over it... I tried so hard that I even convinced myself that what she did was to save my life. Logically, I know she did it to save my life. I know the infection had gotten so bad that amputation was the only way to save me, but she promised me. She promised she wouldn't take it, but she did.

Leaving the lounge, I have no idea where I'm going. Somehow I end up in the cafeteria. Just sitting by myself, thinking of everything that's happened. I cheated on my wife. The one person I vowed to never betray. The one person I love more than anything, besides my daughter. Oh God, Sofia. I jump from my chair and head straight to the daycare to see my girl. I need to see her. Walking into the now lit daycare, I don't see any signs of her.

"Hey Leslie, where's Sofia?" I ask the daycare worker behind the desk.

"Oh, um... Dr. Torres already checked her out a few minutes ago." She informs me, and my stomach drops. I walk out of the daycare and go to the only place I would think they would be, since this storm still hasn't let up, I know Callie wouldn't risk leaving the hospital with Sofia.

When I make it to Callie's office, I see the light on and the door cracked just a tiny bit. I hear murmurs of words being spoken, so I carefully walk up to the the door, peeking in and listening.

"Oh sweetie, I know you're asleep and don't even understand what I'm saying, but I am so sorry. I'm so sorry I screwed this all up. I'm not good enough for your Mama anymore... I don't think I have been for awhile... but I promise I will do everything I can to be good enough for you. I wish your Daddy were here so I could talk to him. He was always a good listener and always gave me his shoulder to cry on. Maybe after the storm is over, we can go see Aunt Addy for a little bit. I know she would love to see you and I could really use a friend right now."

Tears stream down my face as I listen to my wife talk to our daughter in such heartbreaking defeat. I may still harbor resentment for her cutting off my leg, but I never doubted my love for her, and for her to say she isn't good enough for me makes my stomach churn. If anything, I don't think I'm good enough for her. I'm damaged goods. If anything, I should be apologizing to Sofia, not Calliope. Also making my heart break little by little is the knowledge that Calliope plans on taking Sofia to California. Not seeing my sweet baby girl is going to kill me. Sometimes she's been the only bright light in my universe when I was in such a dark place. Not hearing her laugh, her squeal of 'Mama' when I enter a room is going to be torture, but a torture I feel I deserve after everything I've done.

"I love you so much baby, and I know Mama loves you too. I wish she loved me like she used to."

I have to leave because I can't hear anymore. My heart is pounding so fast, that I'm surprised it hasn't beat right out of my chest.

Making it to my floor, I head straight to my office. I can't even be around anyone right now when I have this enormous shame cloud hanging over me. Sitting at my desk, I try to be productive, signing off on charts... anything, but I have the attention span of a gnat right about now, so I shove the charts aside. Looking to my left, my eyes land on a picture of my family. Calliope and I are sitting next to each other, with Sofia in the middle of us. Calliope looks gorgeous as always and my baby girl is as beautiful as ever. Tears sting my eyes just looking at this picture, because I know I may have just destroyed my family. A knock on the door breaks me from the picture and I look up to see the one woman I never want to see again.

"What do you want Dr. Boswell?" I ask coldly.

"I just want to talk Arizona." She replies, making herself comfortable in my chair. Just looking at her makes me want to throw up.

"I have nothing to say to you." Hoping my short responses would give her a hint to get the hell out of my office, but apparently, it doesn't.

"I like you Arizona. I mean, I really like you. What we shared tonight... was incredible. Please, let us talk about it."

"What we shared tonight was a mistake. The biggest mistake I have ever made in my entire life. Because of what we did, I may lose my family. I may lose my wife... the wife that has done nothing but stand beside me, encouraged me and loved me. She put up with me yelling at her, throwing things, blaming her... everything, and she still somehow loves me. So, no... we are not going to talk about this. What we _are _going to do is you are going to leave my office and after the storm passes, you are going to leave this hospital and go back to wherever you came from. I am going to stay here and try to figure out how the hell I'm going to keep my family together."

I should feel bad about the dejected look on Lauren's face, but I don't. I meant every word I spoke. It _was_ the biggest mistake I have ever made in my life and I need to fix it, because I love Calliope more than anything and it's my fault that she's forgotten that. Watching Lauren leave my office was a relief. Slinking back into my chair, I close my eyes.

I must have fallen asleep because I jolt out of my chair when I hear someone knocking. Rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, I call for whoever to come in and I'm surprised to see Callie standing in the doorway.

"Hey" I hedge.

"I, uh, wanted to give you these. Look through them and _know_ I did everything I could to save your leg. Everything from experimental drugs for the infection to rebuilding your bones if I had to. These are all of my notes, research papers, phone numbers of other Ortho surgeons that I consulted with that could verify that I did call them for your case. When I promised you that I wouldn't let them take your leg, I did absolutely everything I could to keep that promise, and if my word isn't good enough for you anymore, these should be. I did everything I could."

I'm stunned as she places a pile of papers and X-rays on my desk. I open my mouth to say anything, but I don't even know what to say.

"You didn't leave me much room to talk last night, but I'm going to say what I have to now... You are wrong Arizona. I _did_ lose something in that plane crash. I lost my best friend, the father of our daughter, I lost a friend in Lexie and I lost you. I spent four days thinking you were dead. Four days of wondering how the hell I was going to tell our daughter that her Daddy and Mama weren't coming home. Four days of trying to figure out how to tell your parents that they lost another child far too soon. Four days of having my heart literally shattered. I know I didn't lose anything physically on my body, and as you so kindly pointed out, I wasn't even on the plane, but last night... that plane crash ripped out my heart and stomped on it for a second time. Since you came back from those woods, I have tried to do right by you. Stand beside you when things were a nightmare. Let you do anything and everything to try and push me away, but I stayed, because I love you. I think I will always loves you... but looking at you now... all I can see is you and her. The woman you let have the piece of yourself that was only meant for me. You wouldn't let me touch you for months, and I'm your wife, but a perfect stranger comes into our hospital and in two days, you were willing to throw away your family like we meant nothing. Then, you blame _me_ for your actions. I can take a lot from you Arizona, but what I cannot take is you blaming me for the demise of our family. That's on you. I will no longer take the blame for your issues. If you still held resentment towards me for making the decision to cut off your leg, you should have talked to me about it. Instead, you made me believe we were better. You made me believe that we were past everything. Instead, you chose to not say anything, then cheat on me."

By the time Callie stops talking, I have tears in my eyes and am completely speechless. Her voice was void of any emotion and that is completely not like her. I have been incredibly horrible to her, yet she stuck by me, loved me for everything that I was, yet I cheat on her with the first woman to show me any kind of attention, besides my wife.

"I think I'm gonna take Sofia to visit Addison for a few days. I need to distance myself from this place for a little bit. I'll make sure to call you so you can talk to Sof while we're gone."

And she leaves.

Leaving my heart shattered in my office.

Fuck.

_**A/N Well, people wanted me to write this... got several PMs wanting me to write what I would like Season 10 to be. I will primarily be sticking to writing You're My Star because it's fluffy and happy, but when I need to write about the not so happy stuff, I can turn to this and The Ultimate Heartbreak. **_

_**A/N Btw, if anyone has ideas for any AU stories you'd like seen written, shoot me a message. I'm always in need of story ideas. Hey, I love to write and do it whenever I have the free time :) **_


	2. Chapter 2

Callie's POV

I'm standing in my apartment, looking around at the pictures of my family adorning the walls, to Sofia's toys collecting in the corner. Once, this apartment was warm and loving. The love Arizona and I created in this apartment was something that could keep me safe. I cherished this place as more than just an apartment. It was where Arizona and I fell inlove. It was where we first made love. It was where we first said 'I love you'...

But now, this place is cold and frail. The warmth this place used to hold has been sucked out with every argument, insult and hateful word.

And now, the love once shared between these walls seemed to be a distant memory. I haven't heard Arizona say 'I love you' to me in a year. That should have been my first clue to her unhappiness and resentment.

Opening the door to our bedroom, I can't help the tears from forming. This room has been my oasis. The bed in the middle of the room has been my cloud in an almost perfect heaven because it is the bed I shared with the love of my life. I have always felt safe in the comfort of my wife's arms, but now... I only see my wife's arms around another woman. Knowing that Lauren Boswell had my wife in a way that was only meant for me, giving her pleasure that I had just recently been allowed to give my wife again, makes me want to break down. I don't have that luxury though, because I have to think about my daughter. That perfect little girl asleep in her crib right now is the only thing keeping me from completely melting down. Hurrying to the closet, I grab 2 suitcases and fill them full of clothes that I will need for atleast a week. I can't be in this room anymore. I don't even think I can be in this apartment anymore.

Since the plane crash, I have tried to be everything Arizona needed me to be. From doctor, to wife, to punching bag, to comforter, to encourager, back to punching bag, to loving and proud wife. I set aside my own feelings and grief to help my wife. Everything I did this past year was always about her, that I lost myself in making sure she had everything she needed. I grieved for my best friend in silence, I cried myself to sleep more times than I can count and I, for a little while anyways, became a single parent to a child that was used to having three doting parents at her beck and call.

I just don't have any fight left in me. I fought so hard to save Arizona's leg, only for me to lose that battle. I fought Arizona as she ignored me, belittled me, ridiculed me and cut me down a few inches. I fought to parent Sofia while her Mama barely acknowledged her and her Daddy vanished from her life. I just don't have anything left in me to give, but I have to try, for Sofia.

Speaking of, that beautiful angel is starting to wake up, so I hurry into her room and I am greeted with the only thing that can make me smile right now... a toothy grin from my love.

"Hey babygirl, did you have a good nap?" I ask her as she rubs the sleep out of her eyes, raising her hands to be picked up.

"Mommy! Up! Pease!" My little girl murmurs sleepily and I laugh for the first time in what seems like a year. I pick her up and her head falls down to my shoulder as she starts playing with the heart locket Arizona got me for Valentines Day. "Mama home?" Sofia asks and I stop breathing, trying to figure out how to answer the oblivious toddler. I look down and identical brown eyes stare back into mine.

"No baby, Mama isn't home right now. She's at the hospital saving tiny humans just like you." I finally answer, my voice cracking as emotions bubble to the surface. "How about we go into the kitchen and make some yummy nums?" I ask the now pouting toddler. A nod in approval is all I need to head to the kitchen. While I whip up something to eat for Sofia, I don't even make myself anything... my appetite has been nonexistant since yesterday. Instead, I place Sofia's food on her highchair tray and walk into the living room to make a call. It only rings twice before the person picks up.

"Callie?" Addison answers in surprise. Not surprising though... I haven't talked to her since after Mark died. My main focus on Arizona and Sofia.

"Hey Addy."

"What's up?"

"I was just wondering... could Sofia and I come visit you for a few days?"

"Wow, really?" I hear the genuine shock in her voice. She hasn't seen Sofia in almost a year, the last time being when she was here for Mark's funeral.

"Yeah, we need a little break and what better way to take a break than to visit Aunt Addy?" I ask, trying to lighten the hurt I feel of wanting to get away from Seattle, even for a little bit.

"What about Arizona?" She replies. Just hearing her say Arizona's name sends shocks to my heart and I'm afraid it'll either stop beating or beat so fast that I start to panic.

"Uh, Arizona has to work. It would just be Sofia and I. We can get a hotel, but..."

"You will stay at my house." She cuts me off. "Jake is away at a conference for the week and Henry is with Amelia for a few days, so it's just me here. When were you thinking of coming?"

"Tomorrow too soon?"

"Not soon enough." She answers, and I can actually _hear_ her smile.

"Okay then, I will text you our flight details."

"Callie... is everything okay? I can hear you trying to be strong for something."

"Not now Addison... I'll explain everything when I get there. I promise." That word slips out of my mouth before I can stop it. Promises. What a fucked up concept it seems.

"Okay. I'll see you tomrrow... " Just as I am about to reply "I've missed you Callie."

A tear slips from eye and I clear my throat twice just to respond. "I've missed you too Addy."

Hanging up and getting my laptop to make flight arrangements, I look over and see Sofia still eating away. Finding a flight to Los Angeles on short notice wasn't easy, nor was it cheap but I could care less right now. I just need to get out of Seattle and think about everything. After booking flights, I called into the hospital and told Jackson I would be taking a three week leave of absence. He didn't ask many questions and approved my request. Now all I had to do was pack Sofia's things and we'd be ready to go.

It doesn't take me long to have Sofia's bags packed and when I come back into the living room, she is done eating and looking at me to pick her up. I clean her off and set her down on the floor with some toys while I double check everything. I called the Archfield and reserved a room for the night because I cannot be in this apartment any longer than I have to. Getting everything packed and ready, I gather Sofia up and head down to my car. When I get to the front of the building, I stop dead in my tracks.

Arizona.

She starts walking towards Sofia and I and I can see her bloodshot eyes and her unkept hair, but that does little to quell any anger I have towards her. Sofia on the other hand, is delighted to see her Mama.

"Mama!" She squeals and wiggles in my arms for me to let her down. I hesitate for a moment, but even if Arizona betrayed me in the worse way, she's still Sofia's mother. I let Sofia down and she runs to Arizona, grasping at her pants to be picked up. Arizona steadies herself and picks our girl up, snuggling closely to her. The scene infront of me breaks my heart more, if that is even possible.

"Hey big girl. I missed you." Arizona says. I have to swallow the large lump in my throat before it chokes me. "Are you and Mommy going on a trip?" She asks, faking ignorance. Apparently she's a master at disguising.

They walk up to me and Sofia raises her arms to me, wanting to be back in my arms. I walk towards the car, opening up the back seat and putting her in her car seat, buckling her in for safety, then putting our luggage in the trunk. I can feel Arizona's eyes on me, and before this, it set me on fire. Now... it just irritates the shit out of me. I turn around and cross my arms.

"What?"

"I um... are you going to the airport?"

"No. Our flight doesn't leave until tomorrow at Noon. I reserved a room at the Archfield because I cannot be in that apartment right now."

"Calliope..."

"No. Don't. Don't say that name. I waited a year for you to call me that. I waited a year for you to tell me you love me. Now, I can't even hear that name coming from your lips without wanting to be sick. Did you realize that it's been a year since you said 'I love you' to me?" I ask and I see her pale at my question.

"I do love you." She whispers, her head down.

"You have a hell of way of showing it." I spit and start to move towards the drivers side. I heart footsteps following me.

"Please, don't leave. You told me you wouldn't run. That's exactly what you're doing." I whip around and I guess what she sees in my eyes is pure anger because she takes a step back.

"Are you fucking kidding me right now Arizona?" I whisper in a harsh tone so I don't upset Sofia. "I have done nothing but stay at your side. I didn't run. _You_ ran. You chose to betray our marriage. It was _you_ that thought a quick fuck in an on-call room with some whore was worth losing me. How do you think that makes me feel? Sure as hell doesn't feel like love. You always talk about being a 'good man in a storm'... well, how ironic that when a storm is actually happening, you abandon ship." I take a step back and take a few deep breaths to try and calm down, but nothing seems to be doing that at the moment. "I took a three week leave of absence and I may or may not spend those entire three weeks in LA. Like I said, I will call you to let you talk to Sofia while we're gone, but that is it. You need to think about what it is you want, because if it isn't me, you need to let me go. If that whore is what you want, by all means, go back to her."

"I don't want her! I want you!"

"I don't think you know what you want Arizona, because if you wanted me, there would be no her. You wouldn't have threatened our marriage over some woman you met three days ago. If this marriage is just a convenience for you, let me go. I can't have my heart broken for a third time in a year. It's too much."

I slip into the drivers seat and start the car. Taking some calming breaths, I look in the rearview mirror and smile at the sight of a now passed out Sofia. I look in my side mirror and see Arizona just standing there, tears streaming down her face and looking back at me, her arms protectively around her midsection. I tear my eyes away and put the car into drive, eventually losing sight of my wife. That's when my tears seem to never stop. I am running. Running away from the pain of my wife's betrayal. Running away from the immense feeling of having weights pressed against my heart. Running away from the silence that engulfed my home. Running away to save myself.

I miss her already.

Fuck.

_**A/N This is short, but I wanted to have a chapter from Callie's POV. Her feelings.**_

_**A/N Was honored to have one of my favorite authors on here follow this story. HandsThatHeal, you are awesome! Check out their stories! **_


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N Lol Apparently since I wrote that Callie and Sofia would be going to LA for a few days, that makes it sound like Callie is "taking Sofia away from Arizona"... Yes, Callie took three weeks of absence, but she will not be in LA that long. She will be coming back after a few days. She isn't taking Sofia away from Arizona, because as it says in the 2nd chapter, Callie acknowledges Arizona as Sofia's other mother. Callie even made sure to let Arizona know that she would call her while they were in LA so she could talk to Sofia. That is in no way taking away her child. Geez people, calm down. I'm not that heartless. **_

Callie's POV

Landing in LA didn't even feel real. I've had no real reason to even come here in the past. Yes, it's a beautiful place to visit, but I've always been content in Seattle.

Now, here I am, with Sofia on my hip and bags thrown over my shoulder, waiting for Addison to appear. I text her before we left Sea Tac and she assured me that she would be there to pick us up, firmly objecting to us just taking a cab.

"Callie!" I hear in the crowd of people. I turn and see the bright grin of Addison Montgomery. Mustering up a smile, I walk towards her.

"Hey Addison." I say before I'm engulfed in a hug, Addison being mindful of Sofia, making her giggle. "Look Sofia, Aunt Addy is here."

"Hi!" Sofia squeals and motions for Addison to take her. We share a laugh and Addison promptly takes Sofia in her arms and cuddles with my love. We share a look and I can tell that Addison knows something isn't right, but she doesn't say anything. Not yet atleast.

We arrive at her house and she immediately starts rambling about anything and everything we'd need to know to be comfortable. She sits Sofia down in a gigantic playroom and Sofia's eyes widen with excitement. She's not unfortunate in the aspect of toys, but this place? This place is Heaven for a kid. With Sofia occupied, Addison motions for me to follow her into the kitchen, with a clear view of Sofia, but far enough that she won't hear anything.

"Okay Callie, I love you and Sofia, and you are welcome here absolutely anytime, but what's going on? You look like hell." Addison finally says as we sit down at the kitcen table.

"Gee, thanks."

"You know what I mean. What's going on?" Her tone is softer, full of concern. The lump in my throat feels like a boulder, but I swallow it down.

"Arizona cheated on me." I can barely get it out and tears are already streaming down my face. Just the mere thought of Arizona with that woman sends my world spiraling. Addison moves her hand over to mine and gives it a squeeze. When I look up at her, I see a sympathetic frown on her face. "I thought we were good. We _were_ good. Then that damn plane crash, and me taking her leg, and Mark dying... she blamed me Addison. She blamed me for everything and I took it! I took all the blame, but what she did... with that woman, in _our_ hospital... I can't get that image out of my head. She didn't even tell me. I walked into the NICU and Lauren was wearing Arizona's scrub top."

"How'd you know it was Arizona's?"

"When we're at work, we don't wear our wedding rings. We pin them on the inside of our scrub tops. Like you pinned your wedding ring to your top when you were married to Derek. I saw Arizona's rings pinned to the top Lauren was wearing. The look Arizona gave me confirmed what I knew."

"Oh Callie... I'm so sorry." She sighs in response but I can barely hear her over my heart pounding in my ears.

"We went to the Attendings Lounge, and that's where she proceeded to basically blame me for her cheating. Saying that I didn't lose anything from the plane crash. That I was basically pretending to be a victim. Am I really that horrible of a person Addison? George cheated on me, Erica left me standing in a parking lot and now... the absolute love of my life cheats on me with a woman she knew for two days. After it took her months to even let me touch her without flinching."

"No Callie... you are not a horrible person. You've just been dealt a horrible hand. Things have happened to you and Arizona that would crumble most people the first go. You survived a gunman, break ups, baby daddy's, car wrecks... your life hasn't been easy. You survived them all. I'm not the best person to talk to about cheating, because of my past with Derek and Mark." Both of our eyes tear up again at the mention of Mark. "But, in my experience, there's always a reason behind cheating. My reason was I just missed being with someone. Derek was always working and Mark was there. It didn't hurt Derek less and I felt horrible, but our relationship hadn't been good for years building up to that point. Your's and Arizona's problems leading up to this was basically her still blaming you for the amputation, right?" Giving a nod, she continues. "Did you two ever talk about it? Like, civil adult talking, not a shouting match?"

"Not really. She hates talking about anything to do with the crash and I was too afraid to bring anything up."

"I can't speak for Arizona, but what I did to Derek... I regret it everyday. I'm happy with Jake and Henry, and I know Derek is happy with Meredith and Zola..."

"And Bailey. They just had a son... they named him Bailey."

"And Bailey..." She offers a sincere smile. "But not a day goes by that I don't regret my actions. My reason for cheating sounds cliche and incredibly selfish, and I also didn't go through something as traumatic as a plane crash, but I am willing to bet Arizona has a reason for her actions."

"Still... she made me believe everything was okay. If she was feeling inadequate, or-or pressured by anything I was doing, she should have talked to me about it. I'm her wife for Christ sakes!" I harshly whiper, more to myself than to Addison. What Addison is saying makes sense, but the pain is still there.

"I'm not saying she isn't wrong... cheating is always wrong, trust me. It hurts and it splits people up. Firsthand experience and all... but maybe there's something behind what she did. Have you thought about seeing a marriage counselor? Or suggested she see a therapist?"

"That's the thing... she doesn't ask for help. Asking her to go to therapy or for us to go to marriage counseling wouldn't go over well."

"Even if that's exactly what she needs? Because from the sounds of it, she's got some issues she hasn't dealt with resulting from the plane crash."

Sighing, I try to think about everything we've just discussed. Have we let our communication get so bad that I missed any sign that Arizona was harboring resentment and anger towards me? Was I so blind and oblvious to the wants of my own wife? Speaking of my wife.

"I need to call her and tell her we made it safely. Even though I'm furious, she still needs to know nothing happened to Sofia." I tell Addison and leave the kitchen, coming up behind my girl and surprising her. "Hey Mija." She jumps in surprise and giggles. "Want to talk to Mama?"

"Yay Mama!" She squeals and it tugs at my heart.

"Alright baby, let's talk to Mama. I'll even FaceTime her and she can see you."

Getting out my cell phone, I go to the FaceTime app and it connects to Arizona. It only rings twice before her face is on my screen.

"Hey." I rasp out. "Just wanted to let you know we made it safe."

She swallows hard and replies... "Good, that's good. I'm glad."

"Sof wanted to talk to you." She nods her head and I point the screen to fit Sofia in.

"Mama!"

"Hey big girl. Are you having fun with Mommy?" Her voice is hoarse and I can barely recognize it as hers.

"Mama, I play blocks!"

"You did? Well, that's great. I love you." At those words, I snap my eyes shut and breath a controlling breath.

"Luff you Mama." Sofia says and blows a kiss at the screen, getting off my lap to go play with more toys. I point the screen to her so Arizona can see, while I try to reign in my emotions. Swiping my eyes to get rid of the tears. After a few minutes of her watching Sofia play, I point the screen back to me and we just sit there in silence. I notice the tears in her eyes and I'm sure she notices the ones I didn't manage to wipe away. Silent pain being passed through our screens is what's happening.

"I, um, I just wanted to let you know we made it okay." I hedge, breaking the silence we were consumed in.

"I really appreciate it. Um, do you know when you'll be back?"

"A few days. After we get back, I'll uh, look for some place to stay. You can stay in the apartment. It's already set up for you and you get around in it perfectly."

"Calliope..."

I leave the playroom and go into an empty room to have this discussion.

"No, Arizona. I can't stay in that apartment with you. Not right now atleast. What you did, what you said... it hurt me in my soul. Not just my heart. My soul. I love you so much Arizona, can't you see that?" My voice is so tight and I choke back a sob at my last statement.

"I know you do. I love you too." She whispers, putting her head down from the screen.

"Then why?" I don't have to elaborate on my question... she knows.

"I don't know! I lost control. Everything this past year has been so hard. I tried so hard to be the woman I was once. The perky, fun loving peds surgeon you fell inlove with... but I'm not that person anymore. She made me feel like she understood me. She is who I used to be."

"I think you need to figure out who you are now Arizona. Away from me. If who you are now wants me... we need to sit down and have a rational conversation. Put everything out in the open, because we can't keep sliding things under the rug. If-if, I'm not what you want, then we need to discuss how we are going to handle Sofia. She deserves both of her Mommies. I know the old Arizona is in there somewhere. I saw it the day you let me massage your leg in the X-Ray room. You looked at me like you did the say we got married. I know she's in there. The question is... do you want to be that person again?"

We both sit in silence once again, lost in thought about what I just said.

"I have to go. Sofia should be getting hungry right about now. I'll call you back before she goes to sleep."

She nods and I disconnect the call. Sighing, I get up and head back to the kitchen to make everyone something to eat.

I have a feeling this journey is going to be rocky... but there are only two outcomes to this. We either figure everything out together, or we go our seperate ways and just be parents for Sofia. As much as my heart hurts now, I know what I want.

It's always been Arizona.

Arizona's POV

_If I'm not what you want. _

Is Callie what I want? Can I handle her not being my wife anymore? Can I handle her just being the mother of my daughter? Can I handle her being with someone else? Someone else who will be waking up to her beauty every morning, playing with our daughter, laughing with them, going to the park with them... can I handle knowing someone else is going to be touching her?

Just the images in my head have my stomach in knots and that answers my question for me.

I _can't _handle that.

I can't handle someone else living the life I was meant to live with Calliope. I can't handle her possibly looking at someone else the way she's looked at me for the past four years. I took the look of love I saw in her eyes every single time she looked at me for granted. My anger and bitterness clouding my thoughts and ability to see that Calliope still loved me more than anything even after the plane crash.

I also can't handle this sense of anger towards her. Looking through the papers and X-Rays she gave me quelled my anger a bit because as she said, she did absolutely everything she could to save my leg. Hundreds of pages of research and consults, experimental drugs and treatment plans scattered on the kitchen bar. I can actually _see_ all of the meaning behind the promise she made me because she did absolutely everything she could.

So, why am I still angry about the leg?

I'm a doctor for Christ sakes! I understand what happens when there isn't an option left. When someone is coding on my table, I have to find the source of the problem and fix it. No matter the outcome, if my patient still has a heartbeat, it's a win.

From what I was told and read in Callie's notes, I was coding in my hospital bed, with every kind of drug you could give someone to prevent it.

I'm going through the final pages of the night I coded and something isn't right. The times on these pages are the times that I know Callie was in the OR working on Derek Shepherd's hand. How could she be in two OR's at the same time?

Hitting redial on my cell phone, I call Callie because something just doesn't seem right. When she answers after the fourth ring, I know by the sound of her voice that I woke her up.

"Arizona?" She groggily answers and that sound makes me smile.

"Hey. I needed to ask you something about these charts on the night I coded."

"Okay?"

"When I coded, I noticed the time on this chart is the same exact time you were in the OR with Shepherd. Did you leave the OR in the middle of your surgery?"

"No?"

"No? So, how were you working on Shepherd and amputating my leg at the same time?" Starting to get angry, I push the papers back and start to pace as best as I can.

"I didn't amputate your leg Arizona."

"Wh-what?" I halt my pacing and my heart stops. I have a prosthetic to prove she did.

I hear a long sigh and shuffling. "I was in the OR with Derek, Karev runs into the OR and tells me you're coding. I start spitting off any kind of medication that I thought would stop you from coding. My mind was going a million miles a second... the thought of losing you..." I snap my eyes shut at the pain in Callie's voice mentioning that. "The infection had gotten so bad that none of the medication was working, you were coding and if I hadn't made a decision right there, there was no coming back for you. I couldn't lose you, so I gave Karev the go ahead to amputate. By the time I got out of surgery with Derek, you were already back in your room from the amputation. I stayed until you woke up."

"So... you didn't cut off my leg? You're saying Alex Karev did?"

"Yes Arizona. I couldn't be the one to take your leg. I had already promised I wouldn't let it happen, but by the time I had a secure plan of action, your infection was too bad. It made you sepsis and you were dying. I gave Alex the go ahead to amputate and he did it while I was in surgery with Derek."

I'm stunned by the new information that is being given to me. All this time, I thought Callie held the scalpel that took my leg. To find out she didn't is incredibly relieving and frustrating at the same time.

"How come nobody told me this? How come _you_ didn't tell me this?"

"When would I have told you Arizona? From the moment you woke up from the amputation, you were disgusted with me. You couldn't even look at me. You stayed in our bed and wouldn't talk to me. Honestly, I didn't think it mattered. I broke my promise to you, even if I wasn't the one holding the scalpel to your leg."

Clearing my throat a couple of times and wiping the tears from my eyes, I hang my head at the pain and sorrow in my wife's voice. "It matters Calliope..."

_**A/N The last part of this chapter is something I think should have or should be discussed. Alex didn't tell Arizona he was the one that actually amputated her leg. Callie didn't tell her... it could be my Calzona loving heart that hopes this revelation means a turn around in their relationship somehow. If not, it's going to be apart of my story lol**_

_**A/N2 Should have a new chapter of You're My Star on Friday. Need to balance out the angst and drama with some good ole Calzona fluff :) Have a great day!**_

_**A/N3 If any of my readers were affected by the Oklahoma tornado, my thoughts are with you and your family. XOXO**_


	4. Chapter 4

Callie's POV

_"It matters Calliope..."_

And she hangs up. What the actual hell?

I look down at my phone and just stare at it... almost willing Arizona to call me back and tell me what the hell she meant by that.

Do I think that me telling her that it was actually Alex Karev that cut off her leg would make a difference? In my mind, no it doesn't matter. It was still me that gave the go ahead to do the amputation, therefore, breaking my promise anyways.

So, why does _she_ think it makes a difference?

And she still cheated on me. Maybe... maybe I could forgive her if it was just a kiss. If Lauren pushed herself on Arizona and Arizona pulled away, maybe I could come to terms with that.

But, she didn't. She slept with her. She let that woman do things to her that only I should have been able to do, atleast recently. How can I forgive that?

With George, when I found out he cheated on me, I didn't feel this overwhelming sense of heartache. I didn't want to succumb to the numbness my body is inflicing on me. Probably because I knew deep down that he and I shouldn't have gotten married in the first place. We got married based on his fear. We didn't get married because we couldn't go a day without each other. We didn't get married because our love was so overwhelming that we had to have forever.

All of that didn't happen for me until Arizona. Arizona was the light in the darkness that was my life at the time. She pulled me out of the darkness that encompassed me. Of course, our relationship wasn't perfect, but I knew that she would be the person I'd want to spend the rest of my life with. I don't regret loving Arizona and I never will... but right now, loving her is hurting me. If I didn't love her so much, this wouldn't be so incredibly hard.

Knowing I can't go back to sleep right now, I get out of Addison's guest bed, check on Sofia in Henry's room and go into the kitchen to get something to drink. Looking out the window, all I see is the ocean waves. It seems calm and that's what I need right now. So, I dig out a light blanket and go outside and the sounds of waves greet me and I can't help the small smile that's playing on my lips. Sitting down in a chair and looking out at the waves, I can't help but think of Mark.

He loved the beach. I'm pretty certain if we didn't have Sofia, he would've tried to convince Lexie to move here. Come on, they may not have been together in the end, but they were meant to be.

"Mark." I sigh, tears already forming in my eyes. "I miss you so much. Everything is so overwhelming and cruel. You're dead, Lexie is dead and Arizona cheated on me. What have I done to deserve this? What has Sofia done to deserve this? Sofia... she's losing so much. She lost you and now, she may lose Arizona. I would never take our child away from her, but I can't trust her right now. She's so all over the place. She went from looking at me with hatred and anger, to looking at me the way she did on our wedding day... to cheating on me with some slut. I know if you were here, you'd be so pissed."

"I miss him too." A sudden voice startles me. I turn around to see Addison standing at the door, arms crossed and tears in her eyes. I motion for her to join me and she moves forward. "When Derek called me to tell me that they were going to let him go, I didn't know what to say. I hung up and burst into tears. Unfortunately, I was at a wake for my friend Pete so it was like a double whammy."

We sit in silence for what seemed like an eternity.

"How can I forgive her Addison? How am I going to be able to trust that when she leaves the house, she isn't out looking for another woman to satisfy her? Or another pretty doctor comes into our hospital?"

"Do you love her?"

"Of course I do! I wouldn't be this hurt or torn if I didn't love her with all my heart."

She nods her head. "Before the plane crash, did you ever think that Arizona would cheat on you?"

"No. The Arizona before the plane crash would never do that. I _know_ that."

"Then you guys need to talk. The Arizona before the plane crash is obviously not the same Arizona now. Something that traumatic... it can change a person. Whether they want it to or not. Things change. What she did was wrong, but you need to find out why she did it." Looking at Addison with watery eyes, I nod and nothing else seems to come out. "Look, stay here for a couple of more days... then go home and find out what's going on. I couldn't save my marriage to Derek after I cheated... I tried, God knows I tried, but it was too late. He was already inlove with Meredith. I've seen you two together and I can honestly say I've never seen two people more inlove with each other."

"That was before Addison... before that God foresaken plane crash. At first, after the amputation, the look Arizona gave me was pure anger. As time passed, things started going back to normal. Then we were so busy with trying to save the hospital from closing down. This one time though... she was in an X-Ray room and I walked in on her. I could tell she was hurting, her leg was hurting but she tried to brush it off. I made her sit down and then I made her stand up, take off her pants and let me take off her leg. She resisted at first, of course... but she finally let me. She let me touch her stump. That was the first time she did. The look she was giving me... I swear, I could _see_ her love in her eyes. How did we go from that... to-to this? Her cheating on me and me running away to California?"

That question just hangs in the air because I know neither one of us knows how to answer it.

Eventually, Addison tells me she's going to check on Sofia and go back to bed. She leaves me with a squeeze of my shoulder. I stay out here to think about everything.

What the fuck am I going to do?

Arizona's POV

She didn't cut off my leg.

I blamed her and she didn't actually do it.

Was I trying to punish her for thinking she cut off my leg, by cheating on her?

Legally, she couldn't have been the one to operate on me. It's policy at the hospital that spouses couldn't operate on each other.

But, according to what I know, she basically bullied Owen to let her come up with my treatment plan and coursed out my surgeries, so it wouldn't have been a far stretch to think she was the one that held the scalpel to my leg. Especially since I coded out of nowhere. She could have went on instinct, rushed me to the OR and done the amputation.

My mind is swimming with this new information and I feel like I'm going to throw up.

I cheated on the love of my life and she wasn't even the one who cut off my leg.

Karev.

Karev cut off my leg.

Reaching for my phone, I dial his number and wait not so patiently while it rings. Thoughts are rushing through my head and I can't slow it down enough to even think about one thing.

"Hello?" His gruff voice finally answers.

"Where the hell are you Karev?" I all but yell.

"Uh... I'm at the hospital. Like I have been for the past 36 hours. Why?"

"I need to talk to you. I need you to come to my apartment. Now."

"But-"

"Now, Karev." And I hang up.

I start pacing the living room, waiting for Alex to show up.

So, my wife didn't cut off my leg. All this time, I thought it was her that held the scalpel to my leg, but no... It was Alex. Why had nobody mentioned this?

Finally, a hard knock breaks me out of my thoughts and I rush to answer it. Alex just strolls right in and stands right behind me.

"Make this fast Robbins, I need to get back to the hospital."

"Why didn't you tell me it was actually _you_ that amputated my leg and not Callie?" I cut straight to the point. No use in beating around the bush.

"Callie told me not to." He replies with a shrug of his shoulders.

"She told you not to? Why?"

"Look, I wanted to tell you. When we were in the therapy room and I was checking out your scar, I wanted to tell you then... Ya know, when I said it wasn't all Callie's fault? I was going to tell you... but I couldn't."

"I thought you were talking about me taking your spot on the plane."

"That too... but Callie said something about being the bad doctor that made the call, so it was solely on her. She told me not to say anything."

"I...I blamed her. For everything." I say, mostly to myself.

"She did everything she could Arizona. And when I say everything, I mean absolutely everything."

"I know."

"Where is she? Sofia?"

"California. Visiting Addison... sh-she needed to get away from me." My stomach churns as I say this. My _wife_ needed to get away from me. She couldn't stand to look at me. "Oh God... I cheated on my wife. That's why she needed to get away from me. I blamed her for everything... I... I told her to stick out her leg and I would get a bone saw and even the score. I slept with another woman... after knowing her 3 days. It wasn't even Callie that cut off my leg... it was... it was you!"

"Hey, you're not going to sit here and blame me for you cheating on your wife. That was all you Arizona. You're sitting here blaming everybody else for your mistakes, when infact it was _your_ mistake. Callie didn't make the plane fall out of the sky. She spent days thinking you were dead. She had to watch her best friend die. She had to deal with you hating her. She snuck into supply closets and cried her eyes out daily because she couldn't do it here. She's taken all the blame and now... now you're trying to blame me for your fuck up. I'm not going to take it like Callie did. You cheated on your wife... you made that decision. I said that just because you cheated on her, didn't mean that you were the worse person, and I meant that... but you're blaming all of your problems on everyone else, when in reality, they are your problems. Callie has done everything she can to help you, support you, love you... but you're pushing her away because of what? You're scared to open up to her? You need help Robbins, professional help, because obviously, whatever Callie was trying to do wasn't working."

With that, he leaves the apartment and I'm stuck in the same spot I was in when he came in. My stomach is in knots and my heart is pounding so loud, I can't hear anything else.

Fuck. How did everything get so fucked up?

_**A/N Not too entirely happy with this chapter... I had severe writers block for this story, along with finishing up You're My Star. Like I said before, chapters for this won't come out fast, but I think I will get this story done before Season 10 starts. **_

_**A/N2 This is just a story I'm making up in my head. Probably none of it will even play out on the actual show. I just write this to get out some frustration with the current Calzona storyline. **_


	5. Chapter 5

Arizona's POV

It's been 4 days. 4 days since Calliope left with Sofia. 4 days of nothing but silence, except for the occasional phone call from Calliope, letting me talk to Sofia. I have no idea when they will be coming back. All I've been able to do is think. Think about how I have completely messed everything up. I betrayed my wife in the worse way. I broke every vow that we made to each other on our wedding day. No wonder she left. If she did this to me, I would probably leave too. It doesn't make my heart hurt any less though.

It's 5pm and I'm just now able to get down to the cafeteria for something to eat. It's been an exhausting day and I haven't heard from Callie at all. Not only is that putting me in a horrible mood, but I've also recieved some harsh looks and heard the whispers of everyone I've been around today. Apparently, everyone knows I cheated on my wife. My wife, who everyone at this hospital adores. If it weren't for her idea of buying the hospital with our collective settlements, all these people would be out of jobs.

Getting my food and finding an empty table, I start to eat when I see Cristina Yang coming towards me. Chewing fast and swallowing, I wait for her to say something.

"You heard from Torres?" She asks in her usual fashion.

"N-no, not today. Why?"

"She left me a voicemail, wanting to know if I could pick her and Sofia up from the airport tonight, but I can't because I have a surgery scheduled and I'll no doubt still be in the OR when they land. I was just wondering if you could get intouch with her for me, but nevermind."

"I can do it." I yell when I see her walking off.

"I don't think so Roller-Girl."

"What? Why?"

"If she wanted you to pick her up, she would have called you. If she wanted to see you, she wouldn't have left. And if you didn't fuck McHomewrecker Barbie, she wouldn't be heartbroken right now. I'll see if Derek can pick them up... but as her friend, and Sofia's Godmother, I'm telling you right now... stay away from them. You've caused enough damage."

"You can't tell me to stay away from them. You don't have that right."

"Maybe not... but nobody around here will hesitate to protect Callie. Even if it's from her cheating wife... Oh look, that's you." She spits back, The words sting my heart and tears form in my eyes.

"I... I know I betrayed her." I stutter, trying to get myself and my emotions under control. Releasing a heavy sigh, I continue. "I didn't mean for any of this to happen, Cristina. What I did... it was the biggest mistake I've ever made and I'll never make it again." I tell the woman standing infront of me. She was there. She saw everything we had to go through. She was the one picking bugs out of my leg. The woman that kept everyone awake when all we wanted to do was sleep. She should understand... right?

"You did more than betray her, Blondie." I flinch at the harshness of the nickname she throws at me, because that's what Mark always called me. No matter what. "I may not be a bed of roses to everyone, but there are a few people I am close to... Callie being one of them. I know her. What you did to her... you took away her security. It's a crippling thing to have the love of your life cheat on you."

She would know. Owen cheated on her in the past. The shame I feel is weighing down on me and I literally have no words to speak.

"Look, I know what you went through in those woods. I was _there._ I saw and heard everything. I also know that you and Callie have the conversational skills of a carrot when it comes to the hard stuff, so you were probably bottling everything up and putting on a bright and shiney front for everyone... but she didn't deserve what you did to her. Talk to someone. Work your shit out. Even if you and Callie divorce, Sofia deserves the best from her Mothers. You may have lost a leg, but Callie? Right now, she thinks she's lost her future with you."

_Apparently I lost you. _

When Cristina walks off, I feel like I've been punched in the gut. The knowledge of knowing exactly how badly I've hurt and wrecked my wife being too much. I toss the rest of my food into the trash and rush to my office. Tears still present in my eyes, but I don't make eye contact with anyone. I can't. I'm too ashamed. Reaching my office, I lock the door and sit at my desk.

I need help.

Taking my office phone off the hook, I hit the designated number and wait. After 3 rings, someone answers.

"Hi, yes... this is Dr. Robbins. I need to make an appointment."

Callie's POV

It's been 4 days since I left Seattle. 4 days away from my home. 4 days without Arizona. Although I missed her desperately, even with everything that's going on, I think getting away from everything was something I needed more than I knew. It gave me time to think.

With Addison's sound advice, I stayed a couple of more days and took time for myself. This past year, I've been taking care of everyone else. Arizona, Mark before he died, Sofia, my patients, being part of the group that bought the hospital to save it, in return, saving the jobs of hundreds of people. At first, I just wanted to hang around Addison's house with Sofia, but with some serious persuasion from Addison, I ended up going to a day spa and being pampered. Addison had offered to watch Sofia the whole day, so she set me up with appointments all day and gave me the keys to her car.

As I was getting a deep tissue massage, I had time to think about everything that was going on. While I am completely heartbroken over Arizona's infidelity, I also have to think about how it all came about. Sure, Arizona never let on that she was still angry. She made me believe that she was better... that _we_ were better. When we were at Bailey's wedding, sitting on the bed in the hotel room that Arizona had gotten on a whim, she looked me right in the eyes and said she couldn't lose me. Right there, is when I thought that she had forgiven me for making the decision to cut off her leg. When we were in the X-Ray room and she let me touch her stump for the first time, the look of love and adoration in her eyes made me believe that we would be okay. When, later that night, we made love for the first time since the crash, she made me believe that everything was the way it was supposed to be.

But... we never talked about anything. We never discussed what she went through in the woods, we never went into depth how she felt after the amputation. She went straight to anger. Did my fear of setting her off again and not discussing anything, push her to do what she did? Was all her bottled up anger and resentment a consequence from us _not_ talking?

I can no longer defend myself to her. What I did, I did to save her life. If that makes me the bad guy, so be it. I would have rather had my wife with one leg, than not have my wife at all. I couldn't live a life knowing I let my promise kill her. So... I had Karev cut off the leg that was killing her. And if it came down to it, I'd do it again to keep the woman I love more than life itself alive. A world without Arizona Robbins seemed so dark.

Although, my world is pretty dark now... because despite not wanting to be without Arizona in my life... it seems she's made that decision for me. How can I stay married to her when she had sex with another woman? I may have broken my promise to not take her leg, but she broke every single vow we made when we got married. We took vows, before God, and she broke them. Then, she had the audacity to blame _me_ for it... like she has been all this time. I don't know if I can stay in a marriage when she doesn't want to be in it. If she loved me like she said she did, she wouldn't have sought out another woman to make her feel good, to make her feel beautiful, when I told her that same thing every single day. I can't _make_ someone want me... and as much as it pains me to say... if Arizona doesn't want me, I can't make her stay.

"Callie!" I hear someone yell, breaking me out of my thoughts. Sofia, asleep in my arms stirs a little, but doesn't wake up. I look up to see Derek weaving through the crowd to get to us. "Welcome back to Seattle Callie." he says, with his McDreamy smile. I smile in return and he picks up our luggage and we leave the airport. I tell him to drop us off at the apartment, so I can get some stuff and move it to Mark's. He doesn't meddle and agrees with no problem.

I get into the apartment and it still feels so cold. So lifeless. So... alone. Derek sits our luggage in Mark's apartment and bids us goodbye, saying if we needed anything, to not hesitate to ask. I thank him and start to grab some things to bring over to the other apartment. As much as I want to stay here, wait for Arizona and get down to everything, I just don't have the energy. Plus, with how I think this huge talk would go, I don't want my princess anywhere near the apartment. While I bring the first load of stuff over, I lay Sofia down in her crib in her daddy's apartment. It doesn't take long to get what little I needed. When I leave 502, I lock the door and turn towards the other apartment, only to stop in my tracks.

Arizona.

She's walking towards me, with an obvious limp, probably from being on her prosthetic all day without taking many breaks. Her eyes are so tired and her shoulders are slumped. She has yet to look up, rummaging through her purse to find her keys I would assume. I want to just walk into Mark's apartment and not even acknowledge her right now, but I seem to be rooted in my spot. Even with everything, just the sight of her has my heart racing. No matter what, I do love her with all my heart, and my body knows it.

When she finally looks up to see me standing there, she stops walking and drops the keys she finally found. The keys dropping on the ground breaking me out of my frozen state and I start to move towards Mark's door. Until she says the one thing that stops me.

"Calliope!" My name. The way only she says it. Fuck.

"Y-yes?"

"I... it's good to see you're back." She says in a shakey coice as she moves closer to me.

"It's good to be back." I tell her, my voice tight from trying to hold in tears.

"Why are you going to Mark's old apartment?"

"Sofia and I will be staying here for awhile. Atleast until we figure out what we're going to do." Tears form in her eyes at the knowledge that I was serious that I wasn't going to be coming back home to her.

She clears her throat, her tears betraying her and falling down her cheek. My first instinct is to reach out and wipe them away, but right now... that's not my job.

"I uh... I made an appointment to see a therapist. I start next week. It was the earliest appointment I could get without physically threatening the receptionist."

"Th-that's good... that's great Arizona. I need to go. Sofia should be up any minute."

"Sofia..." The longing look in her eyes at the mention of our daughter is breaking my heart all over again.

"I'll bring her to you tomorrow. You're off right?" She nods her head. "So... I'll bring her around lunchtime, so you can spend some time with her."

"Thank you Calliope. Can we... can we talk tomorrow? I really would like to talk. Please." She begs. I close my eyes and hold my breath at her desperate plea. Maybe she _does _want to work things out. I won't get my hopes up though.

"Sure... we'll talk tomorrow."

_**A/N Big talk coming up people. Arizona will start therapy. Callie moving into Mark's apartment. Cristina freaking Yang stepping up for Callie. A few things going on in this chapter that will set up for the following chapters. **_

_**A/N2 Even though the Calzona storyline is breaking my heart, I already preordered Season 9 on Amazon. I'm just an addict lol **_


	6. Chapter 6

Callie's POV

I'm nervous. Like, fidget with my necklace, tapping my foot excessively kind of nervous. Arizona is supposed to be here in a few minutes to pick up Sofia for the afternoon. Then, we're finally going to sit down and talk. Probably yell and scream, so I planned for Sofia to have a sleepover with Bailey.

There is so much I want to say to Arizona, but there is also things I need to know too. Why she did what she did. Why she let everything fester. Why she wouldn't talk to me if she still held resentment towards me for making the decision to cut off her leg. It all comes back to the leg. I will always regret making that promise... though, I will never regret making the choice to cut off her leg... it was the leg or her life. I saved her and that is something I will never regret.

The sound of a knock on the door breaks me out of my thoughts and I rush over to answer it, knowing who it is.

"Mama!" Sofia squeals just before I answer the door. I turn to look at the amount of excitement I see in my daughter's face at the thought of spending some time with her Mama and it breaks my heart. Damnit. I open the door and even though I hate the situation we are in, I can't help the way my heart speeds up and butterflies erupt in my stomach at the sight of Arizona. It's always been like this. She will always be the most beautiful woman in my eyes.

"Hey." She says after a moment of nothing but silent staring.

"Hi. Come in. Sof, Mama's here." I announce to our princess and she runs as fast as her little legs will carry her, straight into Arizona's waiting arms. The sight filling and breaking my heart at the same time. A lone tear streaking down my cheek, but I quickly wipe it away before Arizona can see it. "Miranda is picking her up at 5... so, we can talk then. You can take her back over to the apartment until then. I already have everything packed for her." I inform them, getting a nod from Arizona.

"Ready to have some fun with Mama, Sof?" Arizona eagerly asks our daughter, getting a vigorous nod from our girl. Arizona turns to me, "Thank you Calliope." I nod and they leave to go across the hall.

I'm going to use this time alone to get myself prepared for the huge talk Arizona and I will have once Sofia leaves with Bailey.

Arizona's POV

I've had the best time with my little girl today. Not seeing her for the few days she was in California with Calliope broke my heart... more than it already was. We played games, I made us lunch, we watching Finding Nemo, she napped and now... we're waiting for her to be picked up by Bailey so Callie and I can finally sit down and talk. I know this is going to be heart wrenching. She's going to ask me questions that in all honesty, I don't know if I can answer, but I will try my very best, because despite my actions... I do love my wife. Marrying Calliope will always be one of the best days of my life.

"Mama! Aunt Randa here!" Sofia announces when she hears someone knock on the door. She's got her little coat on and she's carrying her stuffed bear in arm, with her backpack on the other arm. I get up and answer the door, allowing Bailey to come in.

"Hey Bailey. Thanks for taking Sofia tonight." I thank her as I hand her Sofia's bag that she dropped near the door.

"It's no problem Robbins. Come on Miss Sofia." Bailey replies and scoops my princess and Sofia releases the most adorable squeal that makes my heart clench.

After saying our goodbyes, I hear them go across to Mark's apartment so Callie can say goodbye to Sofia and I try to prepare myself for the metaphorical storm that's brewing. It's going to be rough but I'm hoping and praying that when the storm settles, Callie and I will be walking outside together to relish in the sunshine.

Fifteen minutes later, I hear a knock on the door and my nerves skyrocket. I shakily walk to the door and open itto reveal a breathtaking sight. Even though Callie is only in a pair of jeans and a dark blue hoodie, she's positively stunning. I haven't just _looked_ at my wife in so long, that I took advantage of the magnificent creature she was. She's absolutely gorgeous and I cheated on her? Yeah, I fucked up... bad.

"Hey." She softly says, her eyes showing her nerves, as well as her fidgeting hands. "I uh... I got us a bottle of wine... you know... to calm us down? Because I don't know about you, but I'm really nervous."

I can't help but laugh at her nervous ramble... usually that's my job, but apparently, I've rubbed off on her.

"Yeah, wine would be great. Come in... it's your place too. You didn't have to knock." I tell her as she moves past me and I can't help but take in the smell of her. She always smells amazing. I see her go straight to the kitchen to get our wine glasses and a corkscrew, so I take the time to get myself under control.

When I finally sit down on the couch, she hands me a glass of white and sits in the chair next to the couch. I can't help the twinge of hurt that courses through my body when she doesn't sit beside me, but I reel it in, knowing I've hurt her much more than just not sitting beside her.

"So..." I hedge. I watch the emotions play in her eyes.

"I just want to know why Arizona. Why did you cheat on me? Am... am I not attractive to you anymore? Did I push you too soon or too far? D-do you want to be with Lauren now?" The questions she fires at me, the tone in her voice and the tears in her eyes break my heart. "Did you do it to get even? For me making the call to cut off your leg? Was that you 'evening the score'? Breaking our marriage vows?"

"You broke your promise first!" I shout, suddenly feeling angry.

"To save your life! Why don't you understand that? You were dying! If Alex didn't cut off your leg right then, you were going to die. Do you get that? That if the amputation didn't happen, I'd be visiting your grave?... But hey, I broke a promise I had no business making, you hate me, cheated on me and now, you blame me for you cheating. Just fucking awesome. I'm just fucking everybody up. Mark is dead, you hate me, slept with another woman, Sofia lost her father, I lost my wife and best friend. I'm amazing." I see her deflate in the chair, tears streaming down her face. I have no words. She thinks I hate her? "Answer me this Arizona... if it were me in your position... I fall out of the sky, have my leg injured beyond repair, made you promise to do anything to save it... would you have let me die just to say you held up a promise? Just to say 'Oh she died, but I didn't break my promise to her. She was buried with two legs.' What would you have done?"

This whole year, I had actually never stopped to think about that scenario. I was so immersed in anger, then trying to sweep that anger under the rug so I could be with the wife she deserved, that I never let myself think about that.

"I would've cut off your leg." I answer her honestly, because I know I would have done anything to save my wife. The realization hitting me like a ton of bricks and the guilt of my actions this past year, along with my actions this past week weighs heavily in my chest.

"Exactly! Why are you still punishing me for something _you_ would have done too? Why did you sleep with her, Arizona? Please tell me... I need to know."

"I don't know!... sh-she kept flirting with me... and, and she researched me. She looked at me with desire. She looked at me with want. She made me feel like I could lose control just that once..."

"And I couldn't? For God's sake, I am your _wife_! I told you every single day how beautiful I thought you were. I tried my hardest to make you believe that I love you more than anything and that I was so grateful that you survived. You wouldn't let me touch you for months but that bitch shows up and within days, you fucked her! Days Arizona... how do you think that makes me feel? Huh? The love of my life, letting some whore Dr. touch her the way only I should be able to. How would you feel if I cheated on you? If I let someone who was practically a stranger fuck me in an on-call room? Would break your heart wouldn't it?" Just the thought of it tears my insides up and jealousy courses through my veins. "About 5 months ago, when you were still ignoring me, throwing shit and being an all around bitch to me... I was at the store one day with Sofia. I was in the cereal aisle looking for Sof's favorite when an attractive woman comes up to me and compliments me on our beautiful daughter. We talk for a few minutes and you know what she did?" I shake my head no, but I know what's coming next and I feel like I'm going to be sick. "She asks me out on a date. She called me gorgeous. You know what I did?" I again shake my head no, and hang my head in utter shame. "I flat out turned her down. Told her I was married to the love of my life and mother to my daughter. Even though you hated my guts, you were it for me because I still held hope out that you would come back to me some day."

"I'm sorry Calliope... it was a huge mistake."

"Would you have told me?" She must see my confusion, so she continues. "If I didn't catch her wearing your scrub top with your wedding ring displayed like a badge of dishonor, would you have told me about sleeping with her? Because you say you don't want to be with her, but when I walked into that NICU, you and her looked comfortable."

"I... I would have told you. And I don't want to be with her. I want to be with you. I want to work on this Calliope, please."

"You said she researched you, right?" I nod, not sure where this is going. "She knew we were married?" Again, I nod. "She knew you had a daughter?" Again, I nod. "What kind of any respectable woman deliberately persues a woman she knows is married with a child? And the worst part Arizona... you fucking fell for it! She's here for one surgery. She was only here for a few days and then she left, not likely to be asked back to our hospital. Say I forgive you... say we move past this and stay married. What makes me think you won't do this again? W-with some random off the street? Or someone you meet at a coffee shop, or the grocery store. I can't live in fear that you'll cheat on me over and over." She says the last part in a whisper and I don't know how much more my heart can take. I get off the couch and stand infront of her, waiting for her too look up at me.

"Calliope... I need you to listen to me. Really hear me." I wait for her to acknowledge she's listening and continue. "What I did... was the biggest mistake of my life. I will forever regret going into that on-call room. I love you. You and Sofia are my world. If you give me the chance, I will make this up to you everyday. I will apologize to you everyday if that's what you need. Please, believe me when I say that I will never cheat on you again. Please Calliope, please don't let us be over. I won't bounce back from you leaving." Tears stream down my face as I plead to my wife. She stays silent as I see her contemplate what to do. My heart is beating so fast and hard, that I'm surprised it hasn't jumped out of my chest.

"I... I won't leave." I breathe a sigh of relief, but she continues. "Under 2 conditions."

"Anything."

"I will stay at Mark's for right now. I can't just jump back into this with you when I can't trust you right now. We are not going to sweep this under the rug like we do with everything else traumatic, apparently. And 2... we need counseling. Professional help because obviously, we're not doing too good on our own."

"Yes. Yes... I will do anything. I already have an appointment with a therapist. We... we can do couples counseling too. Anything to fix this. I can't lose you."

Callie stands up and moves towards the door, leaving me confused. Before she turns the knob, she turns around, wiping her eyes and says "You lost me the second you decided to sleep with Lauren. Now it's time for you to show me that I'm what you want. You fought to stay alive on that mountain. Now it's time to fight to keep our future alive. I hope Sofia and I are worth the fight." And she leaves.

Are they worth it?

Definitely.

_**A/N Sorry it's taken awhile to get this chapter out. Writers block mixed with no time to write due to my crazy work schedule has really taken it out of me. Not entirely happy with this chapter, but I needed to move this story along. It won't be long and it will hopefully be finished within the next 6-7 chapters. **_


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